Top 11 Tips for Long-Distance Grandparents

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The anniversary of U-Haul Day. Anniversary dates have a way of causing us to look back and reminisce. Our family’s UHaul Day’ is March 9th.  It’s been three years since we waved goodbye to the moving truck that carried our only grandchild hours away. I remember standing in the kitchen looking out the window, watching the truck disappear, and thinking “Wow. They are actually moving on my birthday.” Everything in me knew their decision wasn’t a carefully calculated plan to ruin ‘my’ day, but at the time it felt personal. So personal. 

And so my quest began. I could either harbor some negative thoughts or learn how to have a very wonderful, very personal relationship with my granddaughter (now two granddaughters!) from a distance. I’m sure glad I chose the latter! In honor of U-Haul Day, I’ve gathered up some of my favorite long-distance tips and added some new ones to the mix too!  

Top 11 Tips

Many of our connections happen virtually. And the good news is that research shows technology really can help grandparents build relationships with their grandkids!  We use all kinds of tech to connect, but enjoy using the Echo Show for video chatting as it doesn’t have the distraction of all the available buttons and keys to touch that are so tempting to my 15-month-old granddaughter. I like to think she is reaching out to me, but I know the truth haha.

1. A Basket for the Little Ones

Keep a little basket of items ready to go when you get that important call – a couple of short books, perhaps a silly noisemaker, a towel to put over your head, and then remove time and time again…

2. ‘Share’ a Snack

This can be an actual snack (maybe you are both eating a banana) or your little one can ‘share’ their snack through the screen with you. There will be giggles of delight as you eagerly ‘eat’ what they are serving up!

3. Text a Super Short Video on a Regular Basis.

Great for all ages! You can just say hi and how you love and miss them, share a bit of family history, tell a joke, or say a prayer. If you have a selfie stick with a tripod (things I said I would never buy!) it makes the process even easier!

4. Read Together

We’ve used Facetime, our Alexa device, and a couple of other interactive apps. The Caribu subscription has a lot of story options and games too. You simply place a video call through Caribu and then choose stories or activities to do together. My favorite part of Caribu is that you can read, and your grandchild can ‘turn’ the page. It truly is interactive!  Another App we are looking at right now is called PeeWee. It’s a relatively new app where you can record yourself reading a story, and can also record a video introduction. PeeWee contains quite a few classics. It could be a fun option for those with little ones in different time zones where finding time to video chat is a challenge.  So far, I have tried the free story, “Who’s a Good Dog?” and have also purchased the Bedtime Prayer story. Stories are .99 each, or there are additional subscription levels. For older kids, choose physical chapter books to read. You can read to them, or you can purchase two books and read to each other.  You could even read ‘offline’ and then talk about what is happening during a chat.

5. Create a Story Together.

You could use a picture you choose online, or perhaps an old family photo to get the story started. Each of you can tell a story, or you could take turns telling what happens next.  MadLibs are another super fun way to connect!

6. Color together.

Choose a coloring page online and send a copy to your grandchild, or purchase two identical books and mail a copy their way. When Morgan and I color, she gets to lead. She chooses which part of the picture to color next, and also which color it should be.

7. Creative Ways to Share Family Pictures

There are so many great options for photo gifts! Create an actual book (we love Chatbooks), You could have photos printed and laminated. I know one grandma who put a picture of herself on a pillow so her grandchild could hug her anytime. My granddaughter’s other grandma who lives across the country created photo magnets, and Morgan absolutely loves them.

8. Grow Plants Together

Here’s a fun idea from ‘The Seasoned Homemaker’. If you live in similar climates select some easy-to-grow seeds like radishes. You can check on how your plants are doing, and hopefully enjoy harvest together. She also tells of a friend whose father grew watermelon for his granddaughters. They planted the seeds when the girls were visiting, he sent watermelon reports, and then he actually packaged it up and shipped it to them when it was ripe! Wow! 

9. Become PenPals

Use templates, write a story together, send jokes, or share a monthly update. Old fashioned letter writing can be a great way to bond. We have monthly pen pal templates and the most adorable princess-themed templates in the Etsy shop right now. You can check it out right here!

10. Stay Up to Date in All the Ways You Can.

Does their hometown have an online newspaper? Subscribe. Does their school have a Facebook or Instagram page? Follow it. Download their school calendar, sports schedule, etc… Amanda often shares the daily report from daycare, which contains what the girls ate, the academic skills they work on, and a picture. Such a treasure! These are all ways you can stay in touch, and they also give you context to gauge how busy the current week is, and ideas to talk about the next time you chat.

11. Cheer on Your Adult Kids

They do so much to help you connect with the grandkids! Also, read the two-part series on Creating a Safe Place for Your Family to Grow for tips on changing the relational climate amongst you and your grown kids.

We hope you find, as we have, that distance doesn’t have to mean relationally distant. We want to encourage you to select one or more of the ideas in this post, and consider how you might use them with your grandkids this week! We’d love to hear what you do!