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I’ve been thinking about the upcoming Holidays, and the opportunities to gather together with friends and family.
This year, we will be celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas virtually so we are on the hunt for fun and fresh ways to connect, and we’ll be sure to share them with you as we develop them.
This post, however, is about ‘setting the table’, and not in the traditional way. Years ago I read the book Setting the Table by Danny Meyer, a legendary restauranteur.
This book about hospitality in business was a great read, and a great book to review through my grandparenting lens now.
In This Post
Two Habits
Two of the habits he encouraged his employees to develop are ‘looking under rocks’ and ‘collecting dots’.
Looking Under Rocks
In the book he describes going fly fishing, and how the guide turned over rocks looking for details that would help him to identify the best bait. Meyers took this lesson back home to his business and started practicing hunting for details on his guests.
Did they look impatient?
Glance at artwork?
Did they seem bored?
Collect Dots
These were all opportune times to engage his customers (turning over rocks) and then collect some details, or dots as he called them. He could then assess his collection of dots and begin to connect them to provide even better service.
As grandparents, we can do this too! We can watch for opportune moments from our grown kids and grandkids to engage in a conversation that just might provide us with the details we can use to create even better connections.
3 Ways to Be an Expert Dot Collector
1.Be a good listener.
When we are focused on providing information, it is easy to miss the dots! (It also naturally causes me to take the attention off of myself! As a long-distance grandma, there can’t be any ‘woe is me’ time when I’m dot collecting!
2.Ask good dot collecting questions.
Ask questions that uncover information rather than questions that allow for simple one or two-word responses.
3.Think about the information you’ve been given.
What did you learn in your conversation, and how can you connect the dots from this recent conversation with what you already know?
Collecting dots is a wonderful way to ‘set the table’ for family connections. It allows us to provide that extra personal touch, whether it is what we write on a card, communicating something they will find meaningful as we chat, or preparing something with a personal touch when gathering in person.
As you prepare for the holidays this year, we want to encourage you to ABCD!
Always Be Collecting Dots.
Our hope is that you will be able to curate a museum of memories from your collection!